The folks who read my blogs or know anything about me know that I am a huge country music fan. I was listening to the radio recently and heard a song by Big and Rich, “That’s Why I Pray”. If you don’t know this song, the repeating lyrics say:
This week, I had the unfortunate opportunity to be in the emergency room with my favorite pet, waiting to be seen. A woman sitting right across from me engaged me in conversation – she had a dog named Bella and I have a dog named Bella at home (not the pet at the hospital). She loved purple and had a purple phone and a purple leash on Bella. I love purple and had my purple purse and sweatshirt with me. She just returned from a cruise that she hated and still felt seasick from, and I went on a cruise where I felt sick for weeks afterward.
It feels good, doesn’t it? When someone says to you, “You were right.” We like to have our expertise, our opinion, and our perspective validated. Sometimes we feel almost prescient – “I just knew he was going to be a creep!” Or “I thought something funny was going on at work; now I know the business is in trouble.”
The hardest job I have ever had is that of parent. I don’t want my children to learn from my mistakes, and I don’t want them to make the same mistakes that I do. But I do realize that they are watching me at all times. They are learning about how to treat people, how to be in relationships, about work ethics and a host of other life approaches just by watching what I am doing every day. Now I realize that it’s not all about me and my children are also learning from others, but as their mom I know that how I act is very important in their development.
I consider myself to be a nice person (my filter). I like to help other people and will bend over backwards to be agreeable and giving wherever I can. My husband would say that I give “too much”! So, what’s the problem? Isn’t it good to be giving and gracious wherever possible? The problem is that when we give out of a feeling of guilt or responsibility, and not from the heart, we can end up feeling resentful.
There is an often used word we apply to other people: “nice”. What is the definition of nice? Do we ever think about it? According to dictionary.com, this simple word actually covers many things, but a few are: pleasing, agreeable, delightful, amiably pleasant and kind. These seem like basic words that we all understand, but isn’t it fascinating how in one venue a person can be so “nice” and in another, they aren’t “nice” at all?