Active Listening

These two simple words are on one of my favorite T-shirts. It’s from Best Friends Animal Sanctuary (www.bestfriends.org), and it has a cartoon drawing of a dog and a cat together with these two words underneath. It is so simple and yet so powerful. I was wearing this T-shirt at the workout club the other day and a woman said to me, “So easy to say, but not so easy to do.”

Last week I was interviewed on a very lively nighttime talk show in a major city. I’ve been asked often lately to comment on the “Occupy” movements in different cities, and I thought that would be the direction of our conversation. Instead, the host had a number of insights and ideas he wanted to share with his listeners, and he was talking about many difficulties that the unemployed and lower-level employed are facing. Next, he took a call from a listener who vehemently disagreed with his line of thinking and his insights.

Let’s talk about one of my favorite songs by Helen Reddy, again “I Can’t Hear You No More.” Grammatical error aside, this song was a great summary of what often happens between two people who are trying to communicate.

The other day I was having a conversation with my son about his grades. His report card was excellent and he had lower grades in only two classes – Math and Health. I was curious about the health grade – it seems like an easy class, so I wondered out loud to him why he was not doing better. He said, “Mom, all they teach us in health is what you tell us all the time anyway. I call it the ‘Mom class’ because it is just your words over and over about taking care of ourselves.

I had the privilege of going to an Elton John concert this weekend. I’ve been listening to his music since I was a kid and he is still in wonderful form. The music and the band were more than I could have asked for! One of his well-known songs, “Don’t Let the Sun Go Down on Me” written by Elton and Bernie Taupin, really struck me as I was singing along with the audience.

I admit, though I know it will age me, that I am a Helen Reddy fan. I still play her music and “I am Woman” is my ringtone. One of her songs, listed here as the title of my blog, keeps running around and around in my head. When we watch our interactions with others, and we watch people interacting with one another, how many times do we feel “I can’t hear you no more”? It’s as if people are talking but we are no longer listening to what they have to say.